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The Shape Of Alien Cock

explore your fantasies of alien cock

Anybody with a love of science fiction has probably spent more than a few warm moments imagining the intimate details of interspecies lust. If every alien abductee gets a “welcome to our spaceship” anal probing, you’ve got to wonder why, right? And the answer, of course, is that aliens are every bit as horny as we are. They never meet a new sapient species without wanting to conduct a sexual audition as the first order of business!

alien horse cocks and a gangbang about to start

That’s why I have no doubt whatsoever that, from the perspective of intergalactic horndogs, there is only one important question about us oversexed porn-broadcasting orgasm-obsessed freaky humans. And that question is “Do they have any juicy holes into which we can fit our urgent thrusting sex organs?” They want to know how fuckable we are, for sure. That’s why every new flying saucer to hit Earth atmosphere sends down the tractor beam to sweep up some more hapless humans for “important medical testing.”

probed and tested

In all of this, however, the aliens have the advantage of us. They can capture us, and pretty quickly find out that humans are very flexible and accommodating in our organs of generation, elimination, and ingestion. Tentacles, dicks, or ovipositors, it doesn’t matter: there’s a hole in every human captive where our galactic sex lords can make it fit. And what’s more, at least seventy-five percent of the abductees end up having orgasms right there in the medical exploration bay. Humans are flexible, curious, enthusiastic, and kinky! That’s why the saucers have been flocking for almost a century now.

Unfortunately, we mostly haven’t managed to turn the tables on them yet. We’re not abducting slithery sex princesses from their planets, at least not yet. There are no human space pirates out there ravaging pretty rich alien babes captured between the stars on fat interstellar cruise ships. And we don’t have any chained alien prettyboys for our more demanding earthling dominatrixes to play with, either. All of that means we’re left to wonder, imagine, and fantasize about alien cocks.

three alien dildos

Fortunately, we also have the means to realize those alien dick-fantasies in tangible form. We may not have any actual alien cock to play with, but the artisans at Alien Dildo have done an excellent job of rendering our most lurid fantasies in solid silicone. With these toys, you can readily conduct your own probings!

three monstrous alien dildos

With sex toys like these, the aliens don’t have a chance. Can you imagine the consternation of the alien who plunges his scaly shaft deep inside his first Earthling abductee, only to be greeted with a sigh of disappointment? “That’s nice, but I thought it would be thicker and longer, like the ones from AlienDildo.com…”

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Touching The Bug Zapper

Here’s a Youtube video of a woman named Donna getting talked into touching a bug zapper paddle. She squeals very nicely!

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Hi-Res Humbler Photo

the humbler

Photo by D-girl, found on the Humbler Tumblr.